Life Update.

I am volunteering at a bike race this weekend….had to drive 5.5 hours to get here. AFTER staying up till 2am (can’t sleep well with Kingman out of town, so I just stay up.) And getting up at 630am to meet electrician at our new house.Grumpy. Muey grumpy.Paid $100 for this guy to move my disposal switch and hook up light over sink. I noticed the other day it didn’t work. Somehow we ALL missed it. Home inspector, our walk through, owning the effin’ house for a week. It had been replaced…and not wired back up. The strange thing is the other day when I realized it didn’t work- my attention was drawn to it b/c it was crooked and I didn’t remember it being crooked. (BTW crooked is funny looking word). I even joked that I thought we had ghosts.Today when I went to meet the electrician I noticed the little pile of pool toys I made to throw away (seller had left) was scattered. My first thought was hmmm..wonder if the gutter guy moved them. Then on the way up here-2 hours from my house- I realize. There were no gutters where I had piled the pool toys. Then I remember the open back door we found the day after closing.
We thought the sellers agent just left it open on accident.We have not changed the locks yet- but I am doing that first fuckin’ thing when I get back. I am all weirded out. Either we really do have a ghost. Or someone is literally playing whilst we are gone. I am freaked the h-e-double tooth picks out.Then on the drive up I was listening to the audio book “Best Friends Forever by jennifer weiner (or something like that- she wrote “Little EarthQuakes” too)….and I’ll be damned if there isn’t IF issues in it. From a male perspective. Don’t get that often, huh?So then my mind wanders….and it crystallizes in my mind that earlier this year I thought I was going to be able to do this race. I thought I would have to sit it out b/c I would be in my 2ww or just have gotten a bad beta. I had it all planned out. I was thinking I would either be pregnant, PUPO, or getting ready to have one hell of a period.Right now.Oh- HA FUCKING HA!!!!!Why do I plan? Kingman STILL has to find out if he even has troopers. We don’t even know that. I totally thought LAST year for christmas I would be announcing our miracle.Then I thought, well next year at Christmas… I am thinking, well at Easter. Now I realize years are becoming like months, yet the days feel like years.I am Alice. I have fallen down a hole, and I am in a dark, cold and lonely place. Right now I am just empty.But hey-at least I am staying in a holiday inn express tonight. I could pretend I am a physician and heal thyself!!!The disposal switch was 10 feet away from the sink-next to the light switch. Weird.

7 responses to “Life Update.

  1. I can relate. All the crap that goes with IF can drain the life and sense out of you sometimes. Been there- probably will be there again many times in the future.

    Try to rest. Breath. Drink a cup of cocoa. Read a book and forget for a while. That's my coping method right now.

    Oh yeah, and sleeping alone sucks. I swear I must have audiotory (sp?) hullucinations (sp? – yeah I'm tired) at night – it only happens when it gets dark. Bleh. Of course, never happens when DH is around. Hope you're not alone much longer 🙂 Take care.

  2. Spooky house issues! It will be interesting if they change once you change the locks. We lived in an old farm house where strange stuff happened several years ago. Once, a mason jar hurled itself off the fridge and barely missed hitting my BFF who was sweeping and had bent down to pick up the pile. She'd been making fun of my telling her I thought the house was haunted. A few days later, we were watching TV, she and I, in the living room and, from above us, we heard the sound of furniture being dragged across the floor. We both just sat there for a bit and then high tailed it out of there once we realized that a) we both had heard it and b) it wasnt going away. Freaked me out. I didnt want to go home that night! Peter thought we were both nuts until he heard stuff too. He was in the shower and heard who he thought was me going up and down the stairs (so, to him, I was making breakfast or something) then he heard the bathroom door open and close (it had the old fashioned handles so it was noisy and you actually had to apply a lot of pressure to get the door to open). When he got out of the shower, I was still sound asleep. But it was all sorts of things. A lot happened in the bathrooms. I was upstairs once and the door swung open and banged against the wall. And in the downstairs one, I was freaked to be in there alone after dark especially… It was always cold. Just freaky. I loved the house and we were there a couple of years. I was sad to move (although it was a better situation for Peter's job) and after we loudly acknowledged whatever was there and that we werent going anywhere, we were able to coexist peacefully. But stuff always was moved around or little things (like earrings) would go missing. I never went in the basement because it creeped me out and I very rarely went to the attic for the same reason.

  3. Okay, you totally need to get new locks on those doors! How strange.

  4. Wow, that is super-creepy! I'd definitely change the locks, ASAP! Your paint stories were just too funny. Hope you finally got some good sleep!

  5. How odd! A new house has its quirks anyway and then if you have things moving aroung on you?! SPOOKAY!

    I am sorry about the plans that were made and had to be changed. I HATE that about IF. You can't plan anything. Jeff and I got to the point where it was driving us bananas that we couldn't plan anything long term, so we started planning things very short term. We became pretty spontaneous. It helped.

  6. I would be creeped out too! Seriously, change the locks.

  7. Sleeping alone right now is bliss (it could be because JD has to sleep with the two dogs and I'm getting actual sleep now). 🙂

    JD is a huge believer in ghosts, me not so much. I'd change the locks and then talk to the spirits in the house. 🙂

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