Okay, Kingman and I talked the other night about the upcoming surgery and it was really good! He is a lot more at peace about the whole anesthesia process that is good. So far that has been the main thing he has been worried about. Now he is starting think about IF side of it….the what ifs. What if they don’t find anything? What does it mean if all his labs where normal, but they don’t find anything? What if his surgery for his undescended testicles was performed to late (at age 5)?
First off….He asked me to reach out to my bloggy IF friends to see if there are any guys that could give him a few answers.
He wanted to know if there was any guys that had
- a normal lab work up (FSH/LH/etc.), and then have nothing found on a TESE.
- any guys that had surgery to descend their testicles and be able to have children?
- How do the guys “come to terms” with accepting donor sperm if it is needed. After the decision to do donor sperm was made did the husband immediately feel “okay”?
As you can see from the questions that are asked- we had a really good talk! He brought it all up himself, and he obviously has been thinking about it, and examining his feelings about things. I was pretty shocked actually when it happened- we were just headed down to the beach to eat some wings at Hooters. LOL! Perhaps it was all the T n A all around that got him thinking about freeing his Troopers. HA HA HA!!!
We talked about the legislation that is going on in Arizona- and how it breaks my heart to see that it really might pass. (I will resist that soapbox, but I urge you to CHECK IT OUT HERE)
He also admited that he still is a little fuzzy about exactly what happens in this whole process. LOL. We more specifically talked about what happens after ICSI, and the fertilization. I dont’ think I did a very good job explaining- but I is as clear as swamp water to him now. LOL!!!
He is the type of person that revels in the little details- he has to know exactly how each thing happens. It is such a puzzle- he will not leave it alone until he understands it. He doesn’t have time to learn it right now b/c he is studying for this blasted test- but I am sure once he is done he will delve into it. 🙂
He kept asking me if any of the blogs I read have a guy that has what he has (Prune Belly)- that would be no. Then he wants to know if anyone was obstructive azoo, well, yeah- but he has +CF gene….has not has TESE yet….(oh)…..Then he askes if there are any guys with a normal workup, azoospermia, and then no sperm found on TESE. ?!?!? I am embarrased to say I don’t know! I can’t remember all my guy’s (and girl’s DH’s labwork. HA HA!) Of course then he asked about descended testicles, and I REALLY don’t remember about that. I finally told him about Mel’s LFCA, and that I would put a shout out that I was putting up some questions from him on my blog. (***SHIVER*** he has never seen my blog, even though he knows I have an IF one)
He knows about my IF bloggy community- last year I met MammaSoon (Blossom and Her Fruit)(I MISS YOU GIRL!!!!) when I to ChiTown last year, and he has seen my Sock It To Me socks. This was a new realization of the usefulness, and the resource of it. He realized that there are OTHERS OUT THERE!!! There are other like him- perhaps not JUST like him, but facing the same challenges as him. 🙂 That made him feel not so alone. That made me smile.
Thank you all!!!
At one point he took a big swig of his beer and said “I am getting okay with idea of donor sperm- for you. I am getting there. I just need some more time.”
That was sweet- that he is thinking about it. I just don’t want him to feel like he is ‘doing it for me’ I want it to be for us. He asked me if there are any guys out there in blog land that has babies with DS. I kinda laughed b/c I said that is why so many of us blog- b/c we HAVE issues!!!! I tend to follow the ones that have problems similar to ours, so yeah- there are some donor sperms that I follow. 🙂 He wanted to make sure the guys felt okay with the fact if was a donor- and I said that it was pretty much (as far as I could read), as soon as the decision was made to do the DS there was no looking back. That was their baby.
Could my DS couples help me out with that? Please feel free to leave a long comment on ANY of this or email me. Any Assvice is welcome, any thoughts, feelings, etc are appreciated. 🙂
babymakingjourney at gmail dot com
Thank you all!!!