Questions answered…thoughts abound.


Thanks to everyone that helped to answer Kingman’s questions. I am going to try and contact each of you and talk some more- but it really helped. I read each of your comments out loud to him and he listened and really paid attention. He started to want to learn more about each of your and that was very endearing. I talk about my bloggy friends to him, but he doesn’t know who I am talking about so it isn’t ‘real’ to him. For some reason this made your struggles more real to him. I guess it is b/c his/our situation is looming closer and closer to needing to be dealt with head on.

I truly appreciate everyone’s comments!! I ❤ each of you!!!

For some reason Kingman thinks everything is going to be ‘just fine’. He thinks this surgery is going to rescue fully rested Navy Seals and Army Rangers ready for action. He is confident that I am capable of producing a baker’s dozen on each ovary based on my horrific hormone fluctuations each month. (HA HA HA- that was funny…I am quite hormonal).

I wish I could be so cluelessly optimistic. I am guarded and have controlled hope.  It is good to hear him be so positive about it.

About the issue of DS- He said the main thing he is worried about is if he would be able to bond with the child. He isn’t so much worried about it not having his genes, or having someone else’s per se- but if for some reason he wouldn’t bond. We have talked about adoption in the past, and he was all for it. I asked him if he would be able to bond with and love a child that he adopted, and his answer was ‘of course’!  I asked him to just think about for a while (few days) the differences between adoption and donor sperm. Would it be different? Would the bonding be different?  He turned the tables on me, and asked me the same thing. Would I bond with a child that was adopted the same way I bonded with a child conceived with donor sperm?

That was a real thought-provoking question! I would like to say no b/c they would both be my children!!!! I also know that this is real life and until you go through a situation you can’t say what you will do. I know I would LOVE a child as my own unconditionally no matter what, and it would be mine- regardless of how it comes to be held in my arms. That being said- I do think there might be some extra bonding that may happen when you carry a child in your womb 38+ weeks. I say ‘might’ and ‘may’ b/c I don’t know- I have never been pregnant.

If you are reading my blog for the first time- please don’t blast me. I am not saying that you love your child less b/c you adopted BY NO MEANS do I mean that.  I am talking about the bonding- the connection. This is entirely conjecture my house is silent and my arms are empty.

I am by no means an expert on the subject. I can’t even be called a novice. I can only muse.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~IF Update~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remember when I said that my RE’s office had gone crazy? (It is father down in that post) Welp- I had a great Birthday Present today. 🙂 I finally got the nerve to call today- I honestly don’t know why it took so long. No excuse other than fear really. This time I talked directly to Dr. 5000’s nurse- who is the SAME ONE that was there last year. She is a sweetie! I told her when DH’s surgery is- and said we needed to get re-established, and did we need to see a new doctor since ours was now the head honcho guy. She called me back 5 minutes later after she got my file and talked to him (WOW!!!), and she said to NOT WORRY ABOUT IT!!!  He would still be our doctor. YEAH!!! Phew. She offered to get us in to see him on the 14th- but I figured we  would give the lab a little while to analyze and process the POWs fully.

Our planning appointment is the 21st. Then a baby shower the 22…and another the 23rd.

I really REALLY friggin’ hope we get good news….or that could be a disastrous weekend.

So, if my cycles stay the same- I will stay my period June 1st/2nd or so…and we will do some monitoring lab work the month of June. The last monitoring labs were back November of 2008- too long ago to matter. Then perhaps a mock transfer in July and stims in august?

woah!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The  Day to Day~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy B’day to Me!!!

Yesterday I turned Thirty freakin’ Three. It wasn’t as bad as I thought. Kingman send me roses, gave me a food saver, and took me out to one of my favorite restaurants (and I don’t mean Buffalo Wild Wings. LOL!)

My Facebook Account just about exploded with Happy B’day wishes. 🙂 Just when I want to deactivate my account FB goes and makes me smile and gives me warm fuzzies. Damn you wily siren named FACEBOOK!!!!

I talked to my BFF Mrs Sweetness, and she is doing great. Her pregnancy is moving right along, and it was so good to talk to her. I miss my best friend so much it hurts sometimes. I hate being grown up. 😦 I hate it.

Hugs to my Internetz!!

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8 responses to “Questions answered…thoughts abound.

  1. Happy Belated Birthday!
    Sounds like everything is moving along well. July or August is soon!! Whoohoo!

  2. Happy Birthday! Thanks for the comment.
    Feel free to comment or send a message anytime!!
    Glad Kingman is wrapping his head around all of it more.
    Hope everything goes well in the upcoming procedures!!
    HOORAH!!!

  3. Happy birthday!

    I’m glad that things look like they are coming together! Yay!

  4. Happy 33rd! Glad it was great!

  5. Happy birthday to you! Hope it’s a great day. Glad your talks are going so well with Kingman! My husband doesn’t have the Sam condition that he does, but has azoo none the less, his TESE was unsuccessful in finding anything and we are using DS. My hubby blogs (although not recently) at azoowho.blogspot.com

  6. Happy Birthday!!!

  7. Happy belated birthday! And I have many of the same thoughts you do regarding adoption and various other family building methods. I would like to think the bonding would be the same, but I can’t be sure and that scares me.

  8. Great update!
    Happy late birthday! I’m a loser, I’m late. : )

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